• The Dark Silence of the Night

    When the Loneliness gets to you   I am very much having all these thoughts and feelings right now. I really wish I had paid better attention to and heeded my own warning about allowing people into my life. I already kept people at arms length and hadn’t allowed anyone in my life intimately in five years. I thought my husband was sincere when we met. To find out I was nothing more than anyone else he was trying to get to marry him to keep him in the country feels like a level of betrayal I don’t know how to describe. I know we do and say things in…

  • Take Me To Church

    There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin       Gentle sin is without malice or intent. You cannot want to do harm to someone before entering a room, that is intent. You cannot break down our apartment door with an audio recorder in your pocket, already recording and while breaking things throughout our apartment tell me I am “destroying our apartment” all so you can let people listen to that recording later. That is premeditated and malicious. You cannot assault me and then claim you don’t know what I am talking about and that you were never here. You cannot bring an audio recorder into our private…

  • I Don’t Know You

    All In I don’t understand. I have said your name over and over again. I can’t look at any of your photos. When I see you – them. It hurts me so much I feel like I can’t breathe. I feel horrified that you would do and say all those things about me that weren’t true. When I see a picture of just you, you look familiar, but I don’t have that surge of feelings I always had before. When I see a photo of us together, I don’t recognize you. I don’t know who you are. You are a complete stranger to me. I have no idea who that…

  • Praying for Your Soul

    Beautiful Song I hope you’re somewhere prayin’, prayin’I hope your soul is changin’, changin’I hope you find your peaceFalling on your knees, prayin’ You brought the flames and you put me through hellI had to learn how to fight for myselfAnd we both know all the truth I could tellI’ll just say this is “I wish you farewell” Natachia Barlow Ramsey; Postpartum Psychosis Survivor and Loser ~Be Loud, Be Purposeful, Be Strong, Be Courageous, Be Creative, Be Something~